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Mike Dolpies
Father of 2, Martial Artist, Business Expert, Author, Father
Mike spent 10 years as the owner and operator of professional martial arts schools. He now helps martial arts business owners achieve their own dreams and goals through his coaching. He has interacted with 1000’s of kids and parents over the years
http://raisingrealwinners.com/nh |
Biography:
Mike Dolpies (AKA- Mike D.) is the author of the forth-coming book: Motion Before Motivation, How to Quickly Create the Life You Want. He speaks for corporations and associations on the topics of Success, Peak Performance and Ethical Persuasion. Mike is also a Consulting Hypnotist and Freelance Copywriter. You can check out his blog at www.askmiked.com; You can get some free persuasion resources at www.revealtheshortcut.com and you can go to www.raisingrealwinners.com/nh to get a free subscription to his Parenting Audio Magazine: Raising Real Winners. |
Questions:
Q: When my kids were growing up, my husband worked a lot and wasn't around that much. When he was, he was a good father, but I think it had an effect on our son as he seems to look to other father figures though he is now a young man. Is there a way that I can help to reconnect them? My son is in his early 20's.
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A: Being in my late 20's I think I can give you a perspective of someone who is close to the situation. I think it is healthy for your son to be looking at other father figures as long as they are "good people." Meaning, they can lift him up and give him wisdom. Of course having a mentor compared with a "father figure" is a lot differant. His dad just has to reach out and make it work based on the current situation. Of course, they can't go back and have a catch or but dad can begin to take an interest in his son's current life by asking questions and being a good listener. | (view all answers to this question)
Q: My 8.5 year old son (the younger of two boys) still uses baby talk at home frequently. As far as I know, he doesn't do this at school or with his friends. Here are sample situations:
- He is feeling anxious about something, like going on an amusement park ride he doesn't like
- He is being picked on by his older brother
- He is tired and/or in a bad mood
We've tried different strategies to deal with this problem, but it persists. What do you recommend? Isn't he way too old to be doing this?
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A: Sounds like his "baby talk" is routed in the principle of flight or fight. It's sort of knee-jerk reaction. It's turned into a condition response for him. On your part some fun role playing may work- so when all is going well and everyones happy and he is feeling confident about himself- leverage positive mood to "pretend" so that he can "practice" confident responses to situations. You may consider - trying to hook up with a children's social skills coach on your area to make some further enhancements. Then of course any programs that help build greater self-confidence can work too. | (view all answers to this question)
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