My son is about to turn 10 years old. About 7 months ago his grandfather passed away, due to cancer, and it appears to have impacted him more than we expected. He was never really that close with his grandfather up until the last year when his grandfather began spending a bit more time with him (once grandpa found out he had cancer). Since then, my son cries at night, not every night but quite frequently, as he remembers his grandpa. My husband talks and consoles him every time he cries. He/son states that he saddened for my husband now that he no longer has a father. He also expresses concern about growing old (himself) and fear that my husband grow old. He has always expressed concern about growing old even before the passing of his grandfather. My son is somewhat shy...not completely...but certainly not an extrovert. Note- My husband and his dad where not exactly very very close..they loved each other quite a bit they were just not the type to express it much. How long does this continue? Will it taper off? Do we just continue consoling him? Any recommendations?
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My 17-year-old daughter has a close girlfriend whose mother is dying of cancer, with just months to live. We talk about prayer and miracles, but the day-to-day reality is that her friend calls her and cries (she lives about 30 minutes away) and so my daughter cries and then takes several hours to recover. It's impacting her sleep and her homework. How can I help her help this friend? We only know the parents to speak to; there are five older siblings but they're all out of the house and don't seem very close-knit as a family.
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How do we talk to our 6 ½ year old son about the illness and potential death of a family member? His grandfather (my father) has quite suddenly become very ill and has been hospitalized. He has pneumonia and they subsequently have found some unexplained bleeding and that he has leukemia (quite a shock as he was walking around just a few days ago). All this to say that he is up against quite a few challenges, any one of which could be fatal. Taken all together, his prognosis is not very good. We want to talk to our son about his grandfather and aren’t sure what to say to him or how to present the situation to him. He knows that Granddad is very sick and in the hospital. He also knows that I am spending a lot of time there. Any advice would be appreciated.
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My 7 year old son has just figured out that everyone is going to die, and he is upset in the extreme now, vacillating between forbidding any talk of dying as it makes him too sad, and asking incessant questions about death and making declarations concerning death ("I never want to get any older; I don't want you or daddy to get any older").
He's upset enough that he was literally trembling tonight in bed, and has already woken from a nightmare within two hours of falling asleep. He's an intense, sensitive and gifted child, who also has had a language disorder, so some of his emotional development is still slightly behind his peers.
We've been talking about death with him honestly (as we perceive it in our non-religious household), and gently.
Is there anything we can do to lessen the shock of learning and coping with this? Or do we just have to ride it out?
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my son has become defiant, sarcastic, disrespectful, beligerant, withdrawn, combative and even close to striking me .... confides in school friends with personal family matters rather than talk to me about it, trusts friends and teachers advice over mine, even though I have been there every hour of every day for him for school or any activity since his mother died last October he thinks I have never been there for him, chooses to deviate from school plan to follow what his friends think is a good curriculum when he has neither the interest nor the talent necessary for it, bated me into an argument with his friends prearranged and waiting outside telling them I am abusive and physically hurting him and he is scared of me ( there have been only 2 heated arguments including this one since last October ) to justify it then runs out the door with his bags to an awaiting car of one of his friends parents .... now he is staying at his friends house and will not come home .... he just turned 17 ! ..... I don't know what to do ..... i feel like I have been set up and the parents that help him leave have not called me ! Is this legal ? Apparently I have no say and if I try to curtail his involvement with these people ( my wife always thought they were a bad influence but I let him see them anyway .... big mistake ) my son leaves to go to them !
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