Curious…if necessity is the mother of invention, did social networking come about because we inhibited our children’s ability to make friends?
Think about it…
We were told we were bad mothers if our children played outside; after all they could be abducted. So they played inside and were entertained by AAA Satellite TV and the plenty of channels and videos which brought the rise of electronic toys.
We were scorned if our children walked to school for the same reason. We arranged playdates so our children could play with the children of parents that were like us.
When children came over to play, they only knew how to play electronically, so that’s what they did. There was little experience grabbing a ball and playing outside, or getting friends together for a pick-up game.
My daughter, now a college senior, and I discussed the idea of making friends in today’s society. “Mom, I don’t think we had the same opportunities to make friends as you and dad did.”
Over the years we told stories of how we grew up, and she smiled as if our stories were fantasy. Growing up in an urban area, there were at least 50 kids on the block. We went out to play early in the morning and came in for dinner. Games were invented on the fly, leaders rose to the occasion, and friendships were formed.
Parents didn’t step in when friends squabbled; kids figured out how to work things out. You learned by your mistakes that you shouldn’t share a secret because then it was no longer a secret. Since we weren’t overwhelmed with activities, we actually had time for friends.
Facebook vs. Facetime
I am not suggesting that we should reset the clock because technology brings many good things. There are ways to stay connected to friends that move away and share moments in our lives that are meaningful.
There are also ways to connect with people that have similar interests and causes which make it easier as Ghandi suggests, to be the change you want to see in the world.
Connections are not friends. You first have to make friends.
This is an exerpt of a collaborative work by Parental Wisdom® advisors that will be given away as an e-book to members. Become a member to receive your copy of:
Tomorrow’s Adult: Who You Always Dreamed Your Child Would Be.
p.s. You may also want to tell your friends to sign up.
Have a great week!
Tina Nocera, Founder
Unfortunatelly times have changed and not always for the better. It is more dangerous now for kids to play “on the street.” There are more cars on the road, for that matter, there are more roads. There is more crime; everything from assults to child abductions.
Also, parents are “more involved” now. We have a load of information thrown at us from book, pediatricians, the web about how we should raise our children, and if we don’t do something by the book, we are judged as bad parents. If you don’t breast feed… you must be a bad mom. If you let your child watch TV… you are a bad parent. If you let you child play outside by himself… you don’t care about your childs safety… etc.. So I think, its todays society thats too blame for putting too much presure on parents to be SUPER PARENTS and have constant control of their children.
I absoultely love it. thanks for the information
I think we need to have confidence in who we are as parents. Yes we have many things coming into play but you need to step back and think about your children maintaining friends ourtside the home, they are not your friend, they are your children. They need to billed social skills, if you don’t want them outside alone have them invite three or four friends over, encourage them to play outside together, run, jump and scream. It seems today many people build beautiful homes with large yards and they are always going somewhere else.
You can also take turns with other parents where once a week you oversee a group of children playing at a park, your backyard or an empty lot to play ball.
It is too easy just to put them in front of a T.V., it is harder to get involved.
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