Archive for the ‘Kindness’ Category

What legacy will you leave behind?

Tuesday, August 29th, 2017

Carry out a random act of kindness with no expectation of reward, safe in the knowledge that one day someone might do the same for you. – Princess Diana

Parents wonder if our children hear our words, learn the lessons we try to share or see the actions we model. Yet sometimes we see a glimmer of hope as they perform a random act of kindness for a classmate or ask you to help a stranger.

At those times you secretly smile and think, ‘ah yes! It is working.’

Well if you ever have doubt, I suggest you look at Prince William and Prince Harry 20 years after their mother, Princess Diana’s death. Even though they were still relatively young when she died, they witnessed how she genuinely cared for those less fortunate and take up their own causes today.

Our children shouldn’t believe they are the center of the universe. It’s likely they are fortunate and should be encouraged to help others. There’s a commercial that really bothers me where a little girl asks viewers if she is cute and responds herself saying, “I think I am.” But then goes on to say that mom and dad can’t play with her because they are busy cleaning. Is it just me or does anyone else think that the cute little girl can help mom and dad? She gets to learn what is like to do a little housework and help mom and dad so everybody can play!

If we are concerned about the polarization of views in this country, a unifying view could be that kindness always makes things better. Anyone disagree with that?

Start kids thinking early about helping others. One way is to sponsor a child through Children Incorporated. Their mission is to provide resources to children in need in the United States and abroad. They passionately believe that children everywhere deserve education, hope and opportunity. Our kids may need to know every child doesn’t start out with the same advantages.

Like Princess Diana, our legacy is that we should leave the world a better place for our children. It may be a small start, but much like Saturday chores, why not make them active participants?

Have a great week!

 

Tina Nocera, Founder

Parental Wisdom®

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Unfortunately our present may be our future

Monday, July 18th, 2016

hope is not a strategy

Each week as the adults are talking about the current example of unimaginable violence, we worry about what to tell the kids.  Instead of protecting them, share your values.  Let them know how you expect them to treat others.

As an example, this past weekend a friend was at a fast food restaurant with her 13 year-old son.  She asked him to hold the table as she got the food.  After they left, he began crying in the car and told his mom three kids called him an F… Slow Stupid Retard. He is autistic.

The mom told her son the boys probably don’t have parents that teach them right from wrong.  They may not be loved as he is loved.  They simply may not know any better.  But we do.

Hope is not a strategy, but decisive planning is.  Don’t expect your children to learn kindness or empathy on their own.  As their greatest and most important teachers, that is our job.

We are being distracted by things such as Pokémon Go.  We have to be careful or the cult film Idiocracy will be our future.  The good news is that when children are born, they don’t know the hate or prejudice that are the root cause of our problems as indicated in the lyrics below from South Pacific.  Perhaps, we’ll get lucky and the parents who would teach hate and fear will be too busy playing Pokémon Go.

You’ve got to be taught

To hate and fear,

You’ve got to be taught

From year to year,

It’s got to be drummed

In your dear little ear

You’ve got to be carefully taught.

You’ve got to be taught to be afraid

Of people whose eyes are oddly made,

And people whose skin is a diff’rent shade,

You’ve got to be carefully taught.

You’ve got to be taught before it’s too late,

Before you are six or seven or eight,

To hate all the people your relatives hate,

You’ve got to be carefully taught

lyrics from South Pacific

Hoping for an uneventful week.

Tina Nocera, Founder

Parental Wisdom®

 

What could you do if you had $1 million dollars?

Sunday, November 9th, 2014

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.”

—Leo Buscaglia

What could you do if you had $1 million dollars? What could you do if you had a single dollar?

Though your answers would be quite different, the sentiment might be quite similar.  If you think about it, waiting until we had a very large sum of money to do good stops us from doing what we can, with what we have, right now.

November 10th to the 14th is World Kindness Week

That is the approach that Alex Radelch took when he posed the question from his college dorm at Purdue University in December of 2012. He created this video and within the first 24 hours of recording the video, he was contacted by people in countries all over the world.

Alex then sold some personal belongings, order some ARK (Acts of Random Kindness) cards, and started a website aimed at creating a community of people dedicated to spreading kindness. As all of this was happening, a team began to form. A team of four close friends bent on impacting the world through kindness. And, just like that, ARK Project Now was born.

If you are one of the many people posting notes of gratitude, then you know how blessed you are.  How about we sign up for acts of random kindness?  I just signed up and committed to once a week.  Sounds only OK, but getting ramped up may be half the fun.

Enjoy your week!

 

Tina Nocera, Founder

Parental Wisdom®

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We must not give our children too much

Sunday, December 15th, 2013

Your children need your presence more than your presents.  – Jesse Jackson

Privileged Texas teen Ethan Couch was charged in the deaths of four pedestrians while driving drunk.

His attorney used the ‘affluenza’ defense claiming that he had a sense of entitlement and was irresponsible.  His poor behavior was due to the fact that his parents did not set proper boundaries.

The judge gave the teen 10 years of probation for the fatal accident. Prosecutors were seeking the maximum 20-year prison sentence.

In the season of giving, you may want to give your children less in terms of material things.

You may want to consider the four gift rule:

  1. 1 thing they want
  2. 1 thing they need
  3. 1 thing they wear
  4. 1 thing they read

You are probably done shopping now.

Have a wonderful Christmas!

Tina Nocera, Founder

Parental Wisdom®

Random Acts of Kindness 2013

Sunday, December 1st, 2013

The countdown begins!

December 1 is day one as little children open Advent Calendars eager to find a surprise each day until December 24th.

The holiday season is our time to build family memories.  

Some families cut down their own tree; others watch classic holiday movies, some bake cookies, while others write an annual holiday letter.  The common thread is just that – a thread, and threads are like habits.

Habits are like a cable. We weave a strand of it everyday and soon it cannot be broken.

-Horace Mann

It’s never too late to start new traditions. I’m going to start a new tradition this year which is to perform a random act of kindness each day until December 24th.

Please follow me on twitter #randomactsofkindness2013.

Traditions matter more than the gifts and more than you realize. Ask your children about their favorite holiday traditions. Guarantee this will make you smile.

Have a great week!

Tina Nocera, Founder
Parental Wisdom®