Archive for the ‘Parenting 101’ Category

Happy Earth Day Microsoft!

Tuesday, April 22nd, 2008

Where do I begin? I just sent out an email to Parental Wisdom members (below) which talks about how we’re stopping our children from enjoying the most wonderful lessons on earth in a rush to excel. I came across a piece by the senior product manager at Microsoft that I have to share:

You helped her learn to walk. He’s totally potty trained at last. Just when it seems you’ve conquered the most angst-ridden issues faced by parents of toddlers, here comes another source of concern: In a world increasingly dominated by technology, familiarizing your child with a computer and online tools is more important than ever.

Parents can’t afford to wait until their children start school to introduce them to technology, says Craig Cincotta, senior product manager at Microsoft Corp.

“Schools are incorporating computers into their curricula at very early grade levels. It’s not unusual to find a computer loaded with learning software in preschool and daycare settings,” he says. “Children who have experience with computers at home will have an edge over those who first encounter technology in the classroom.”

Boy, is this person ever wrong. Children are becoming frustrated and angry, even at young ages because we are not allowing them to be children – children are meant to play, especially outdoors.

Have you ever tried to toilet train a child too early? It doesn’t work. When children are ready, toilet training is easy. The same is true of education, computers and sports. Let children play freely, and when the time comes for studies and computers and organized sports, they will come ready to learn.

Here is the email sent yesterday to Parental Wisdom members.

We do not inherit the Earth from our Ancestors, we borrow it from our Children.
-Ancient Proverb

Global climate change, pollution and how large a carbon footprint you leave behind may seem like many issues parents face – overwhelming.

The answer is actually quite simple and lies in the ancient proverb that states we borrow the earth from our children.

Unfortunately, we take our children from the very thing they gravitate to, the wonders of nature. We put them in schools too early, in front of computers too early, in organized sports programs too early, all because being inside and educated means they will be safe, smart and ready for a cutthroat world.

According to a recent article in the Wall St. Journal, the birthplace of kindergarten is returning to its roots – quite literally. Children ages 3 to 6 walk into a forest outside Frankfurt Germany to sing songs, build fires and roll in the mud. To relax, they kick back in a giant ‘sofa’ from the Maker&Son made of tree stumps and twigs.

Fredrick Frobel, the German educator who opened the world’s first kindergarten actually called it a “children’s garden.” He suggested that children of this age learn far more by playing in nature than they do immersed in letters and numbers.

Let’s move from ‘No Child Left Behind’ to ‘No Child Left Inside’ and stop our 5-year-olds from what some educators call ‘early academic fatigue.’ If you can’t change the education system, at least you could give your children the gift of spending time with nature. Take a walk with your child and see what he sees, it’s amazing what a young child can teach you.

Perhaps if we made this a habit, there wouldn’t be a need to set aside April 22nd to remember the Earth; everyday would be Earth Day.

Mud pies anyone?

Take me to your shredder

Sunday, April 13th, 2008

I’m confused.

We understand the problems associated to childhood obesity and began to educate families and limit advertising unhealthy food choices to children.

But we are also faced with economic woes. Families are in debt and children are getting mixed messages about the concept of wants vs. needs leaving parents literally holding the bill.

To make matters worse, children are now the direct targets of credit card companies looking to give our children exactly what they don’t need – an entry to the never ending world of debt.

A number of years ago, I wrote the U.S. Treasury Secretary to suggest that unsolicited requests for loans are credit cards would be stopped. Initially my thought was to fight against identity theft. But as I noticed my children getting applications for credit cards. Great – let’s add this to the list of popular culture culprits that parents fight.

What the first thing you do when you find yourself in a hole? Stop digging.

Capitalizing on teachable moments

Monday, March 17th, 2008

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A good reputation is more valuable than money.
– Publilius Syrus 100 BC Maxims

In the midst of our incredibly busy days, parents search for something called quality time. But time is time, and each week we are given exactly 10,080 minutes; no more, no less. Time is the great equalizer – it doesn’t matter how much or how little money you have.

How we spend that time is what matters. Interestingly, we often spend time in things we can document, quantify or measure, such as activities like sports, school, chores, and work. But what matters more are the things you can’t measure, such as the impact of teachable moments. We need to look at those opportunities as gifts and capitalize on them.

Thank you Former Governor Spitzer. Thank you for giving us the opportunity the explain to our children the difference between little and big mistakes. Thank you for giving us the opportunity to ask our children a simple but very important question,

“What do you think your reputation is worth?”

Since we are surrounded by popular culture, what used to be considered infamous is now immediately considered famous. We are in the parenting fight of our lives and need to find opportunities to reinforce our values despite the world’s perceptions of values imploding around us.

The young woman in the Spitzer case stands to make millions from the publicity. Again, discuss with your children what her reputation is really worth? A new show called Moment of Truth offers large money prizes for true answers. Unless you’ve lead a Mother Teresa-like existence, I would suggest not trading your reputation and family embarrassment for dollars.

Despite your best attempts, you can’t be around your children all the time, so the next best thing is to make sure they are thinking before they act. No doubt they will make mistakes, but have discussions that reinforce the values you want to instill so you can at least minimize that possibility. I know you think children sometimes don’t listen, but they do. After all, if we didn’t listen, how could you explain that when we grow up we all sound just like our mothers or fathers.

As you end your discussion, put this seed in your child’s head;

“Before you do something – think, would you be proud or embarrassed for us to learn about it?”

That will tell them all they need to know.

Limiting Marketing to Kids

Saturday, March 15th, 2008

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A few years ago I asked my nephew what he wanted for Christmas. He didn’t know. I asked him if he watched Saturday morning cartoons, because I remember when my kids were little that’s where they saw the toys they might like.

He told me there were no toy commercials, only food commercials. He was right. And the commercials bombarding our children promoted foods and beverages that were high in fat, sugar and salt.

Finally, consumer organizations world-wide will pitch a proposal to limit the amount of food marketing to kids. The group is calling for a ban of radio or television advertising of these foods between the hours of 6am and 9pm, and a ban on marketing the same kinds of unhealthy foods on social networks and other new media. Additionally, they are calling on a ban of promotion through toys and gifts and the use of celebrities and cartoon characters.

If you would like to hear about the new reality parents face, and actionable ideas, visit Parental Wisdom® and listen to our Park Bench® broadcast entitled Feeding Our Children to Death.

News at Eleven

Wednesday, March 12th, 2008

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My daughter and I were in the parking lot of a Dunkin’ Donuts when we spotted a young child asleep in her car seat. No adults were in the car. I kept thinking how irresponsible this is, and how the parent would be hysterical on the 11pm news if something terrible happened.

As I read the story about the woman arrested for leaving her child in the car only for a few minutes I thought, why would you take that chance, even if for one moment.

There is nothing else to say.

The History of Throw Blankets: From Functional to Fashionable

Tuesday, March 4th, 2008

Throw blankets, once seen as purely functional items, have become indispensable in the world of home decor. Today, they are not only practical for warmth but also serve as stylish accessories that can transform a room. This article delves into the rich history of throw blankets, tracing their journey from basic necessity to fashionable must-haves in modern interior design.

The Origins of Throw Blankets:

The history of throw blanket is as old as the need for warmth and protection. Early humans used animal hides and woven fabrics to shield themselves from the cold. These primitive blankets were rudimentary, focusing solely on function. The concept of a “throw,” as we understand it today, began to take shape with the development of textile production, which allowed for more refined and portable pieces.

During the Middle Ages, blankets were valuable possessions, often passed down through generations. They were typically made from wool, a material that was widely available and highly effective at retaining heat. These blankets were more substantial in size and weight, designed to cover entire beds or be wrapped around the body for warmth.

As trade routes expanded during the Renaissance, so did the variety of materials and designs available for blankets. Exotic fabrics like silk and cashmere began to enter European markets, reserved for the wealthy. These luxurious textiles introduced the idea of a blanket as a status symbol, laying the groundwork for the throw blanket’s evolution from mere utility to decorative accessory.

The Evolution into Home Decor:

The Industrial Revolution brought significant changes to textile production, making blankets more accessible to the general public. The mass production of fabrics meant that blankets could be made more quickly and in a wider range of styles and materials. It was during this time that the throw blanket as a distinct category began to emerge.

By the 19th century, throw blankets had started to appear in parlors and sitting rooms, draped over sofas or chairs. These smaller blankets were not just for warmth but also added a decorative element to the space. The Victorian era, known for its opulent and heavily decorated interiors, embraced throw blankets as part of the overall aesthetic. Throws were often made from rich fabrics like velvet and adorned with intricate embroidery, tassels, and fringe.

In the 20th century, throw blankets continued to gain popularity as both functional and decorative items. The rise of interior design as a profession further solidified their place in home decor. Designers began to use throws as a way to introduce color, texture, and pattern into a room. The throw blanket became a versatile tool for creating a cozy atmosphere, allowing homeowners to change the look of a space with minimal effort.

Throw Blankets in Contemporary Interior Design:

Today, throw blankets are an essential element of home decor, available in countless styles, colors, and materials. From chunky knit throws that add a touch of rustic charm to sleek, modern designs that complement minimalist spaces, there is a throw blanket to suit every taste and decor style.

In contemporary interior design, throws are often used to create a layered, lived-in look. They can be casually draped over the arm of a sofa, folded neatly at the foot of a bed, or even hung as wall art. The versatility of throw blankets makes them a favorite among interior designers and homeowners alike.

Beyond their aesthetic appeal, throw blankets continue to serve their original purpose of providing warmth and comfort. In today’s fast-paced world, they offer a sense of coziness and relaxation, turning any space into a sanctuary. Whether used for a quick nap on the couch or as an extra layer on a chilly night, throw blankets remain a symbol of comfort and style.

Conclusion:

The history of throw blankets is a testament to their enduring appeal. From their humble beginnings as simple functional items to their current status as fashionable accessories, throw blankets have evolved to become an integral part of home decor. As they continue to adapt to changing tastes and trends, throw blankets will undoubtedly remain a beloved element of interior design for years to come.

Barack on Parents

Sunday, March 2nd, 2008

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I’ll give you an ‘Amen’ Senator. Yes, there are some simple things parents need to do before any government or education programs can be successful.

So simple in fact, one would wonder why we’re not doing them now. He suggests simple things:
• “When that child comes home you’ve got the TV set on. You don’t check the homework… So turn off the TV set, put the video game away, buy a little desk or put that kid at the kitchen table.”
• The Illinois senator also urged parents to teach healthy lifestyles. “Make them go to bed at a reasonable time, keep them off the streets, give them some breakfast, come on,” he said. “Can I get an amen here?”
• He also admonished parents to take responsibility for their children when they make mistakes at school. “Since I’m on a roll here,” he said, “if your child misbehaves in school, don’t cuss out the teacher. You know I’m right about that.”
His response sent the crowd into frenzied applause. “All right, all right, everybody settle down. We’re having too much fun here,” he said.

Can it be that simple? Actually, yes.

Conversation anyone?

Thursday, February 28th, 2008

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The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (CASA) at Columbia University has launched a parenting forum to engage parents in conversation about how to raise drug- and alcohol-free children.

Casa has given parents a method of approaching the important conversation of substance abuse prevention. When I have spoken with my own children about local abuse prevention programs, they didn’t think the programs were very effective. The large number of middle and high school students that are abusing drugs and alcohol would prove that point.

The best prevention is home, where good behavior is modeled and bad behavior, as often illustrated by popular culture and young Hollywood, is a great opportunity for a dialog on what not to do. Since we’re often uncertain how and when to start these conversations, Casa offers some great ideas.

The best times to talk are obvious; well before the problem begins.

First Rule – Do No Harm

Tuesday, February 5th, 2008

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The Hippocratic Oath is an oath traditionally taken by physicians pertaining to the ethical practice of medicine. It is widely believed that the oath was written by Hippocrates, the father of medicine, in the 4th century BC.

You may have heard it begin this way, ‘First, do no harm’.

Parents should have to subscribe to that.

It is difficult enough for us who love our children to be certain they are safe. Why would any parent open their home and put their child at any sort of risk for a reality TV show?

The Baby Borrowers,” a takeoff of a BBC series, appears to leave babies in the care of inexperienced teenage strangers for long periods of time.

If we want to give teenagers a challenging taste of parenting reality, have them spend a Saturday afternoon in a Chuck-E-Cheese.

Parents, remember the Hippocratic Oath.

The Beauty of Balance

Friday, February 1st, 2008

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An article from the Belleville Intelligencer of Ontario Canada describes the concept of balanced parenting. What I love about this article is that any of us can relate to the situations described.

In balanced parenting there are rules, consequences and love. There is not an umpire deciding who did what, which makes sense because you won’t have an umpire following you around in life to rule on fairness. We all know, life isn’t always fair.

The concept of balanced parenting, if done consistently, would help us raise children that accept responsibility and think before he/she acts.

In my book Because Kids Don’t Come With Manuals® I wrote that a parent’s job was to raise happy, healthy, independent children that contribute to society.

Can becoming a balanced parent make that goal easy?